The inifinite abyss in the mind...

Have you ever felt lost? Have you ever looked at the person to the right or the left of you and wondered how they have it all together and you don't? I have spent the greater part of my life asking myself this question. There have been times when I felt all was right with the world or at least myself, but those moments are few and far between. I wonder if I am doing the right thing. I wonder if I am following what God has planned for me. I even wonder sometimes if I am wasting God's time. I realize that I only have this one life to live. I only have today, and I want to live it to the best of my ability. The problem is that I don't know what that means. What do I need to do in a day to be able to say I pleased God? Witness to someone? Work really hard at my job? Have my quiet time? I allow these questions to burn holes into my brain until I start to go crazy. I begin to panic thinking that I may have made a wrong choice here or a wrong turn there. But somehow He always manages to remind me that I cannot do anything to please him. "He knows how I am formed, He remembers I am dust...." I am a speck on a speck on a speck on a speck in this massive piece of creation called Earth. I can find my self on Google maps and zoom out realizing that within a few clicks I am invisible. There is nothing about me that is special. There is nothing that separates me from Joe or Suzie or even Bob for that matter. Its like his Word says... "I am dust...." But the think is He loves me anyway. He loves me because he created me. It is kind of like when you were little and drew that picture for your mommy in art class. It looked just like everyone else's in the room, but you loved it just the same because you created it. You know everything there is to know about those people you drew. You know all the memories that have been made in that house behind your family portrait, and you know that the picture you created will make your mommy and daddy smile. God created me. I wasn't some cosmic error, a product of a bang, or some coincidental accident. I was planned long before the earth was even created. I was planned when Jesus died for me, and I was planned when my mommy and daddy were married. I may be a speck on this earth or even a speck on a speck on a speck on a speck. But one thing still rings true... God cherishes me. He is always here with me and He always will be even if I do get lost in that infinite abyss in my mind.